fuck me stupid, shoulda been running.
Similar in meaning to “Boy, am I a dumb ass,” this advanced application of “fuck me running” is to be used in situations which were originally a surprise, but now have recurred over and over again, and the fuckee (that's you) has still not had the sense to leave.
As in: “I still have a joint checking account with my girlfriend. Well, fuck me stupid, shoulda been running."