isla vista

an almost too-good-to-be-true college student playground nestled in fabulous santa barbara where the apartments are absolute shit yet $650/mo to share a room. at night, IV crawls with thousands of piss-drunk students, all walking from house to house sucking up the greater half of california's vodka supply. sadly, neartly half of these party-goers are arrested by the IV foot patrol for DIPs. isla vista is an overall awesome place to spend your college years.

A town in NW Santa Barbara, adjacent to UCSB, where college students go buck wild.

a place that brings out the most degrading immorall unsavory part of every college student that goes there a place so decadent, drug infested and tall cann trashed with mattresses and stolen bikes lining the sidewalks , where couches are set ablaze early morning on the beach which also happens to be in a weary decay ruined my microwaves and broken refrigarators thrown impulsivley from an ocean side dp balcony in a drunken fit of rage. Girls so slutty that the idea of ever paying money for sex is utterly ridicolous and the chance of gettin an std is 100% 50% with a condom if you could ever find one in the substance induced stupor at 3 in the morning in the the small run down 700 dollar a month flat that you share with your roomate who is luckliy too unconcious to here the sounds of the young floozy being violated in every orifice of her body while you some how try to keep it up despite the the pint of sailor jerry rum that you swilled down with the 8 ball of coke bong tokes and the possible x pill and shot of h, but shell never know if you finish its the thought that counts.... but all in all its my favorite place ive ever lived and my time there has been worth ever seond and ill return before its all over.

A student slum located west of the University of California, Santa Barbara. Housing is in short supply and cramming three or even four students into a bedroom is common, with some people paying over $1,000 for a "bed space", which is 1/3 of a bedroom. Infrastructure is often poorly maintained, with roads flooding every time it rains. Most people get around by bicycle, and bicyclists break traffic laws with impunity creating a hazard for drivers. The majority of residents are UCSB and SBCC students who throw wild parties every weekend and trash the streets.

Isla Vista is artless province rotting from within the virgin innards of Santa Barbara County. It is a college town and everybody does keg stands until their eyes poop out of their faces, at which point they use these were-eyes to play beer pong, at which point the game is called Blind-Pong, and there is music playing that sounds like this:

You kaint see me tho
Thowin balls atcha cup

thowin balls atcha bitch
(bridge refrain verse)

On Tuesday nights Isla Vistans ritually sit in VERY small groups and do the reading of words, either from the books, the internet or the news paper. Snorting lines of cocaine off of the knowledge they outcry (frats, sororities, cooperatives - everybody, factually noting):

"Poop."

At the center of Isla Vista there is a great tower, which can only be reached by spelunking through a great cave which takes the adventurer through lifetimes of irony and cognitive dissonance (and nightmares induced by intense loneliness - it literally takes lifetimes to get through the cave) and when the young adventurer gets to the tower, she jumps from its great height and lands in the arms of angels below on The Of Del The Playa (The BEach, in Spainish), the sands they are cold and warm with intent; the waters are the healers of tomorrow and the white bitches

Well, the white bitches go to heaven

Ninjas call it That Gnarly Obstacle Course ( / Tree of Knowledge).

Annoying, nomadic non-student denizens of Isla Vista (IV), near the U.C. Santa Barbara campus; in the late 1970s, held court in IV's famed Dog Shit Park (DSP).

Always in search of booty, the pirate of Isla Vista reigns supreme among bums. Raging on all weekends and willing to show anyone his tricks

Long live the pirate! Santa Barbara loves you!