Jersey Fancy

When you jizz in the eye of your girlfriend, and before she can wipe it off you attach a sliced jersey royal potato so it looks like a monocle.

Note: The potato must be pre prepared as surely you will not have the potato nor the utensils to carry out such cutting upon ejaculation (unless you're into seriously freaky shit)

When you jizz on top of a boiled jersey royal potato, so it resembles the blob of cream on top of a Mr Kipling's French Fancy cake. Then you or your loved one eats it.