Kelpy G.

A character in SpongeBob SquarePants who prodices the best smooth jazz you have ever heard. Also has awesome hair

The god of jazz, Kelpy G is the unsung hero of Spongebob Squarepants. Kelpy G's music will sooth your body and soul. The cult of Kelpy G is usually associated with this character, the cult aims to bring Kelpy G to every boy and girl, no LGBT though because Kelpy G hates libtards. Kelpy G spends his time on his TV show, and he also performs for the smellies. Kelpy G is the absolute best character in the Spongeoverse. Kelpy G is an avid supporter of Pro Life and Pro Guns, he usually appears at anti-lgbt and anti-liberal rallies

The best smooth jazz artist known to man. First appearing in an episode of spongebob, although he has lived on well after his appearance on the show. He is now worshipped in a variety of ways; most notably the “Cult of Kelpy G.” Also you like jazz???

An infamous person during his time, however when he looks down, he recognizes the length of his penis is below that of average.

A cult consisting of smooth jazz enthusiasts. The only music allowed is that of Kelpy G’s. The cult has three tiers; the lowest being the slaves, the second being the disciples and the third being the Elite. These all hold different purposes in upholding Kelpy’s influence globally, however, the cult has one central prophet who interrupts the wisdom of Kelpy G and leads over the cult. To join simply stick or your pinkie and thumb finger and shake in a back and forth motion, while saying “mahala.”