kerfuckeditis
noun. A crippling disease that can unknowingly strike nearly anyone at any given time. Symptoms include: being the root cause of but not limited to at least 2 kerfucked situations. Also know as the Midas Touch of Shit but to an extreme. There is no know cure but it is said to leave as quickly as it had shown up.
Haven't you heard? He's got the Kerfuckeditis!