Lamplot Ownage

On a tuesday night, When one commits the act of intercourse with a friend's mother and, just before he finishes, pulls out, runs to his friend's room, and ejaculates on his eyes. In the morning, he will arise with dried crusty semen on his eyelids, preventing him from opening them. Under the assumption that he has pinkeye, he will undoubtedly use a large amount of Visene to remedy the situation.