Laundry Fairy

When you empty the washing machine and find a coin at the bottom, you have been visited by the Laundry Fairy, an ethereal being more charitable than the Tooth Fairy (although in some reported cases, the money has been left in exchange for an article of clothing).

The mythical, benevolent being who invisibly swoops in and magically changes the stinking mountain of dirty laundry into freshly washed, dried, and folded garments, artfully stacked and organized, and, possibly, even delivered to the bedrooms of the actual owners/wearers of the clothing. This is done for the sheer delight and personal gratification of the Laundry Fairy, who has absofuckinglutely nothing better to do in life, so no thanks or reciprocity is necessary. Really. However, Laundry Fairies have been known to file for divorce, kick children out of the house, and shove random baskets of laundry up the rectal orifices of housemates. Extreme Caution, and doing your own damn wash, is strongly advised if the Laundry Fairy begins mumbling about power chainsaws.