linden high school

run by a fat principle who jogs around the school after hours to “lose weight”. lhs can’t afford funding for shit b/c the budget is hated by all the citizens. the deans like to take your headphones and hats to pretend like they do their job when all they have to do is go into the bathrooms and bust kids for smoking on school property. the teachers are either really cool cats or the BIGGEST dickheads you will ever meet. the kids are the worst part of all. you have the obnoxious spanish bitches who squeal at frequencies that will make your ears bleed and they group in the hallways like cancer. you have the black bitches who think everyone wants to know their business and then give you lip when your fed up with hearing their shit and want to walk around their giant, slow moving asses. you have the stoners who flock to the smokers’ corner every morning (and any free period they have) just to get their fix for the day (hour). you have the fat italian (polish too) bitches who think they are the hottest thing since sliced bread. you have the dirt bag alternative learning center (alc) kids and juggalos (same thing). the honors kids and the preps. and last, but not least, the freshmen with backpacks that make you stare in wonder at how such a tiny person can support a backpack four times the size of his body; they like to run through the hallways b/c you can never be too early for class! yeahh rightt.

Linden is a awful school, filled with lots of pot heads and cracks. Big bad dudes that say racist slurs, and drive trucks with confederate flags. Don’t mess with the school lunch, the lunch aids often put leftovers from the trash and serve the next day.

A School located in Linden, Michigan full of people that will never amount to anything. Approximately 80% of the students have tried marijuana and of those that have tried, 90% smoke it regularly because they are losers. The football team is pretty much the only good part of the school, having won a majority of the regular season games, but then end up getting their assholes eaten out in a disgusting manner during the playoffs, esp. during the 2010 playoffs when the starting quarterback threw more passes for touchdowns to the Goodrich Martians, than to his own team. Students fit into one or more of the following categories: Jock; Douchebag; Prep; Whore; Pothead; Loner; Bitch; Obnoxious; or Smart-ass. Those who graduate from Linden usually remain in the area until they die because they are all racist pricks who would get their pussies ripped in half if they were to go to a major city.