Loo Fairy

A lady who wears fake tan (applied with a trowel), and makeup made of cement, tattooed on eyebrows - sporting a brightly coloured maxi dress (from 'The Asda") and normally a Scouse (equally could be a Geordie or Glasgow) accent.
Normally found to be frequenting posh city centre bars, in the hope of bagging a footballer or similarly wealthy male - (must be of the metrosexual variety).