Louisiana Hotplate
Essentially the same as a cleveland steamer but with an added layer of protection: a layer of Saran wrap. It is the sexual act in which a person craps on another person's chest and sits down and rocks back and forth on the turd. Makes cleanup a breeze too.
After watching a special on dateline, Jane became so worried about std's that we had to sub-in a Louisiana Hotplate instead of the usual cleveland steamer