Man Lunch

A lunch that involves just men eating things like meat, potatoes, fried food etc. Vegtables, salads and similar are strictly forbidden.

The kind of lunch your dad might send you to school with, as opposed to a woman lunch that your mother makes. Man lunches, unfortunately, are paltry, awkward and poorly planned compared to their feminine counterparts. Scientists say this is because men's brains are missing a part that gives woman certain culinary sensibilities.

The quintessential man lunch is water, which contrary to popular belief, is not a food, crackers, a cheese sandwich and a banana, which are each, respectively, crushed by the water. Man lunches also sometimes have milk in a resealable container, which becomes lukewarm within minutes of being taken from the fridge and leaves a film of foul residue on the container that will never be completely washed out.

Man lunches are usually invoked in arguments about gay marriage.

3 martinis and some pretzels. Commonly used to make the long half of the day a little more pleasant.

Going to the strip club during the day.