audi lucy

... to save his manic tongue the unnecessary syllables, the tweaker told his shrink to henceforth refer to this symptom as Audi Lucy, reasonably she agreed. Suddenly, however, just outside -- sirens began wailing like a fussy baby being fed chalkboard-fed organic rusty nails, giving way to a sound so abysmal and horrendous. He knew that roar. Undoubtedly, it was a homicidal Sassafrassquatch ripped to his tits horny on speed. It's eyes rolled back as he furiously masturbated, bursting blood vessels on his forehead, grimacing, bellowing a sinister, gutteral yelp. & it's meat staff erupted like Pompeii, one could see all over his sweaty body morphing veins as the blood coursing through them coagulated into ropes of iron-enriched lumps of throbbing gristle. Upon the final primordial kung-fu pump Sass echoed a warcry so LOUD ALL OF the streetlights went dark and every car parked on this street's alarm started up as their auto glass shattered . Then Sassafrasquatch quickly pulled up his Dungarees to check for potential witnesses, and his gaze FROZE locking eyes with the thousand-yard stare behind his therapist's sunroom pane... Fuck this! He screamed bloody murder.
Or was that just the Keurig percolator shitting out again? Holy shit did I say this entire-- was I talking? DID SHE HEAR ME?! why's she insist on using such a jalopy coffeemaker? She gonna charge extra for all the Sass cum on the back deck???

La-la-la-la, i grab my tinfoil earmuffs and leapt off the fire escape.