Matthewism
Defined as the religion created from the superior name, by superior beings. To follow the faith of Matthewism, one must pray to the great demi-God; Pastor Matthew, hallowed be thy name. One must also deface a church of Danielism. And only after those spiritual undertakings, will one be allowed into the divine kingdom of Matthewism.
Wow! I just found out that Adam Sandler is a follower of Matthewism! He's my new favorite celebrity! He's the BEST!
Matthewism
1) A type of pun that makes you shake your head in disbelief that it was actually said.
2) A comment from a person that is expected to be taken as the gospel regards of how faulty or unlikely it is simply because of the person who is saying it.
2) A comment from a person that is expected to be taken as the gospel regards of how faulty or unlikely it is simply because of the person who is saying it.
1) While standing at the urinal, one guy says to another, "Having a pissy day?" Reply: Shakes head and replies, "Damn Matthewism."
2) "Well actually, the F-14 Tomcat is the best fighter jet because it is powered by the Commador 64 with a 28 inch floppy drive running at 87.2% capacity." Reply: no audible response necessary.
2) "Well actually, the F-14 Tomcat is the best fighter jet because it is powered by the Commador 64 with a 28 inch floppy drive running at 87.2% capacity." Reply: no audible response necessary.
Matthewism
To lead people on with comments or made up “facts” to the point that they are not sure if it is true. To babble out false facts like you just finished your doctorate paper on the subject.
Did you know that back in 1954, the same year I was born, is when they had the first live internet porn website? You don’t want to know why I know that fact.
Man taking his wife to laser corrective eye surgery. Honey I have something I have wanted to tell you before you find out because frankly it is inevitable that you will find out on your own soon. So for the last few years something has been happening that I hope you can forgive me for but I really hope you can still love me. Honey now that you will have corrected vision you will finally see that for years now, well, I have been going bald.
If you ever are upset about rodents or insects getting into your house you will be really pissed if you ever have to deal with a cow infestation they get into your crawlspace and walls and are just a bitch to get out. Classic Matthewism
Man taking his wife to laser corrective eye surgery. Honey I have something I have wanted to tell you before you find out because frankly it is inevitable that you will find out on your own soon. So for the last few years something has been happening that I hope you can forgive me for but I really hope you can still love me. Honey now that you will have corrected vision you will finally see that for years now, well, I have been going bald.
If you ever are upset about rodents or insects getting into your house you will be really pissed if you ever have to deal with a cow infestation they get into your crawlspace and walls and are just a bitch to get out. Classic Matthewism
Matthewism
A certain self-loathing in which one holds a clear position against a belief system, and yet has those exact views under a different name.
Man 1: "Advertisements should be banned from internet websites. Businesses don't need revenue because the people don't need private businesses."
Man 2: "What are you talking about, are you some sort of Marxist?"
Man 1: "What? I abhor Marxism. I am just against large corporations."
Man 3: "He's not a Marxist, he's a Matthewist! Damned Matthewism..."
Man 2: "What are you talking about, are you some sort of Marxist?"
Man 1: "What? I abhor Marxism. I am just against large corporations."
Man 3: "He's not a Marxist, he's a Matthewist! Damned Matthewism..."
Matthew
Matthew is the cutest guy you will ever meet. He is charming, goodlooking, and very nice. He can get on your nerves at some times, but he is the best guy in the whole entire world.
I wish my matthew would like me.
Matthew
Someone who everyone can't resist. Evryone loves him and he loves everyone back. Doesn't get angry a lot but when he does get angry he woops ass. Watch out for them because they are cool!!!!
Hottie #1: WHO IS THAT HUNK!!!
Hottie#2: Man he has to be a Matthew!!!
Hottie#2: Man he has to be a Matthew!!!
Matthew
A sexy, nice, athletic guy who is kind to everyone and knows how to treat a lady. He will always be there for you when you need a shoulder to cry on. He is out going, fun and just a jokester. He loves to party and fun to be around!
Damn i want a Matthew <3