Meatatitis
A person who has a meat allergy which causes them to break out in hives.
Person 1: "That girl Lee over there developed a rash after i slapped her with my lamb chop."
Person 2: "Looks like she has meatatitis"
Person 2: "Looks like she has meatatitis"
meatatation
Meatatation (noun): The act of meditating about eating delicious, savory meat.
Instructions:*
Close your eyes and imagine sitting in your favorite chair, a plate of smoking hot bacon** sitting close by. You bring it toward your mouth but pause, enjoying the sweet scent of apple-wood bacon** wafting by your nose as you prepare for the wonderful sensation that is about to take place. You take a bite and chew slowly, enjoying the savory deliciousness that is bacon**
Once you have finished your first block of Meatatation, imagine eating a second piece of bacon or enjoying another tender and savory option from the many delicious meats spread out on your imaginary table.
Repeat with your favorite meats for as long as desired, or until the urge to prepare and/or eat said meat in reality becomes overwhelming.
*Modify however you want. Meatatators make tough decisions (but enjoy tender meat).
** Numerous scientific studies strongly suggest that bacon is the most effective stimulus for eliciting the incredible sensations associated with Meatatation. The issue is far from resolved, however, as animal models of meat enjoyment suggest that individual differences in meat preference may modulate the impact of Meatatation on bodily sensations.
Instructions:*
Close your eyes and imagine sitting in your favorite chair, a plate of smoking hot bacon** sitting close by. You bring it toward your mouth but pause, enjoying the sweet scent of apple-wood bacon** wafting by your nose as you prepare for the wonderful sensation that is about to take place. You take a bite and chew slowly, enjoying the savory deliciousness that is bacon**
Once you have finished your first block of Meatatation, imagine eating a second piece of bacon or enjoying another tender and savory option from the many delicious meats spread out on your imaginary table.
Repeat with your favorite meats for as long as desired, or until the urge to prepare and/or eat said meat in reality becomes overwhelming.
*Modify however you want. Meatatators make tough decisions (but enjoy tender meat).
** Numerous scientific studies strongly suggest that bacon is the most effective stimulus for eliciting the incredible sensations associated with Meatatation. The issue is far from resolved, however, as animal models of meat enjoyment suggest that individual differences in meat preference may modulate the impact of Meatatation on bodily sensations.
I tried meatatation for the first time last night but then I ate a plate full of bacon and steaks so I may need to wait until this afternoon to try again.