medical school

A place where one learns how to live without sex (see celibacy), money, food, and sleep, in that order. The ceremonial white coat given to all students after 4 yrs of medical school sends a clear message to onlookers that doctors don't need sex or sleep, but often indulge in either so as to "fit in". Ironically, after getting out of medical school, having previously learned to live without money, many doctors compensate by squandering their money on cheap whores and failed marriages.

The place Biology majors go to have their dreams of becoming an ethical physician brutally slaughtered whilst simultaneously getting into insummountable debt.

Two long miserable years of boring science followed by two more years of witnessing the human body's ultimate betrayal, followed by 4 more years of A) trying to get away from all the horrible needy freaks (including workers AND patients) and B) trying not to get caught when you make mistakes.

A place where visions of all those doctor "reality shows" come to die. In other words, your time spent there will become hell itself, with the final product being a slave of the system itself. Even if do escape there "unscathed", the process of school will never end, especially if you have to specialize in surgery itself.

The place where Rich white kids, smart Asian kids, and horny Indian kids come to learn that Biochemistry is the subject of Satan. Oftentimes, these 4 years reflect regret in not learning Korean (to decipher professors) instead of learning Spanish (to decipher your patients). These 4 years are filled with defining "firsts" Ex: First time White Kid A screwed an Asian Girl. First time Indian Kid A got laid period. First time Asian girl tried lesbian porn to pay for her abusive boyfriend's car insurance.
Overall: any prolonged experience that includes alcohol, 8am clinics with rectal exams, lab coats with unexplainable stains, and unsurmountable debt.

A place where one wastes the prime of his youth studying ridiculously long, hard, tedious, dry, and unbelievably boring subjects, which he will totally forget about after the exams. Most likely going suicidal and severely depressed in the process, the stress will eat his life span like fire through wood, his hair starts to fall quite early, said subject's diet consists of energy drinks and caffeine.

Not only is one expected to be an academic genius, and a a God-like clinician, society demands that you become a social angel, smiling at everything and everyone, treating everyone like a king/queen, excellent with small talk, ..etc. Basically you have to be the enslaved incarnation of Mother Teresa.

If you manage to pull it off, you will then discover a fact that will shake the boundaries of your life, and either drive you mad, or causes the return of the suicidal thoughts ... The fact that Medicine is the absolute most inaccurate science on the face of the earth, and I mean light years more inaccurate than chaos math; each case presentation will make the text book seem like a fairytale book.

Come specializing, you will find that every chapter you've studied is in actuality a 3,000+ paged book. But that's another story.

The place many see themselves gaining acceptance too, but if smart, divert paths. If one doesn't reach the best conclusion of straying away, they might recieve acceptance. Once acceptance is given, the student must learn and accept the fact that they are no longer the top student of their class, they are merely mid-par.

Students will learn the sciences and strive to please their teachers and study for countless SOM exams and government examinations, and finally exiting the 2 years of condensed MSI-II year study believing that they could potentially make a positive impact on patients lives. MSIII-IV brings about the reality that work normally goes unappreciated. Years of internships and residencies allow the individual to gain further understanding that one should do the bare minimum to avoid law suits and potential complications.