My Hooves

Often used in place of "my feet", especially for bovine creatures, and Yak. Originally - Tom Green. Now used the world over (and especially in the south of England where they have nothing better to do) for comedic purposes and as an answer to everything. Hooves make a certain clippy-cloppy sound, so any use of "my hooves" is often preceeded by the question "Do you hear that sound?", even if there is no sound.

Never is it said in standard conversation. Always it is said manically. Crazy laughter occurs before, during and after speaking the words. The louder it is said, the better.

An competition also runs throughout all parts of the year to see who has trotted in the most interesting place. Any part of the country may be exposed to this phenomenon.

Beware. It's infectious.

"Oh My Goodness!" on another level. Not necessarily pertaining or related to a specific species of Equus caballus.