New Egypt

A town known as "Neegypt" by the locals in the middle of NJ that nobody has heard of and all the towns around hate for being full of ignorant white trash hicks and cheap whores. You will also still see Trump stickers and confederate flags even though they are from a fucking Union state. Legend has it that you can hear people in camo screaming YEE-YEE from the high school hallways with cowboy hats and boots. Nearly every person under the age of 20 is on drugs, sleeping around, or an alcoholic, and the high school doesn't even have bathrooms anymore since they have been rebranded as cigarette and juul lounges. You can find teenagers hanging out by the radioactive Oakford lake, Potters Square, the well, main street, or loitering in front or basically living in the two Wawas it has. This type of behavior then results in old people complaining on the town facebook page about delinquents. The town probably has more cows than people, and a loose horse or tractor traffic is not an unknown occurrence, and hunting season is like a second Christmas. All guys here in the high school are either wannabe rednecks or fuckboys that use the snapchat dog filter, and all the girls are either thots that wear nothing but Victoria's Secret PINK or trashy mudcrickets that will ride any guy with a nice truck. You can't keep secrets here and nobody can't keep their traps shut for shit, and most New Egypt kids end up working at either IGA or Six Flags Great Adventure, even though they all hate it.

A town in the geographical center of New Jersey. Despite its being only one to two hours from all of New York City, Philadelphia, Jersey City, and an hour from Trenton, it has a higher goat and horse to people ratio than any other town in Central New Jersey.

Less than fifty percent of the students in the school system actually like the town. All of whom probably have never been out of the town and seen the real world.

Though parents move to the town thinking that its being small will help avoid drugs, this theory is irrefutably complete bullshit. The percentage of students using is just as much as any other school, maybe less when put in comparison to more urban school systems.

The town does not have much to do, but most people(mostly uderaged) spend all their time in town. In most cases, but not all, it is to buy large quantities of pot.

In the center of the town is Oakford Lake. This lake is radioactive, and plays host to ducks with three legs, or two legs and three feet, and two headed frogs. This is not surprising, as parts of the town are built on multiple old toxic waste dump sites.

better known as NE to anyone who lives there, is the smallest town you've ever seen, that no one knows exists in Central Jersey, and where no one understands why anyone would voluntarily move there. A town that is over-run by dirty mexicans and pot smoking highschoolers. Where the only exciting thing to do is go to Six Flags Great Adventure (GA, to the locals). And where your children are more likely to do drugs than if you lived in the hood. 'Town' and 'The Well' are the central hang outs of NE. New Egypt is the town where everybody knows everyones business, and where people thrive on rumors. New Egyptians will complain continually about how boring and gay it is, but once they leave will defend it to the death. Almost every New Egyptian will be mistaken for being from actual Egypt, at least twice in their lifetime. Better known as 'hickville.'

A town in the middle of no where, No one knows where it is or how to get there, even though it is in the center of New Jersey. The smallest town anyone could ever live in. The school population is not even over 500. Its lame as hell and is full of pot heads, sluts, and bitches. The High school is nothing but fulled of drunken whores. Everybody knows everyone and everything about them. No one can keep a secret and everything gets twisted around. If anyone asks you where you live and you say New Egypt people will say where the fuck is that? IGA is the "hot spot" because the town doesn't have anywhere to work for miles. the down is practically run down and over rules by MS-13. Every other town around New Egypt hates it. The Football teams suck, and there is way to much POP Warner. The town is full of hicks. and knows nothing about being "scene". End of story New Egypt sucks and is the worst place to live

The place every1 is ashamed to say they live in so they just say “by jackson,” or “next to sixflags.” The ppl here REEK of homophobes, racism, republicans, furries- & that’s just skimming the surface. Ppl here either chill in the nice places- like potters square, Ivins, Hawkins point, SixFlags, etc.. Or take their chances in town w/ the radioactive lake on one side, & the sketchy wawa on the other. Ig there’s also some good parts, like.. & don’t forget about.. yeah that about sums it up. Ppl move here thinking their kid is going to have a great life, then the kid turns into the next mob boss of the 2000’s & ends up selling weed behind the sketchy wawa living in their parents basement for the rest of their lives. Legend has it if you scream any country artists name anywhere in New Egypt- a stampede will form. I can also guarantee that if u think ur secret is really safe w/ someone, u better find a good hiding spot & a new school to transfer to! Ur gonna be sitting in your room crying the next day wondering how the entire state now knows what you, a freshman, did with that senior last night! I also think every girl in this school can agree that whoever tf thought starting the mullet trend was a good idea- needs serious mental evaluation. Don’t even get me started on summit either- someone needs to end that & put all of us out of our misery. If ur planning on going to NE, u might as well prepare yourself to have your dreams crushed. U wanna go to Harvard? Not happening anymore.

An area with more farm boys then normal people.

**ABBREVIATION NOT TO BE MISTAKEN WITH NATIONAL ENGLISH HONOR SOCIETY**

9:1 teacher-student ratio - you'll get the help you need... probably

95% graduation rate (somewhat higher than state avg.)

Don't even bother reading the google reviews; they're complete and utter bull-crap. Talk about a lack of diversity within the school itself - the public statistics speak for themselves. This school is infatuated with boasting about its notable former alumni (Snooki, Keith Jones, other D-list celebrities) and athletic awards/recognitions, but fail to notice that it's only mere survivorship bias. Don't like it? Allentown's choice-eligible.

Looking for a great word to describe the school itself? I'll give you one: Yee-yee

NEHS-sympathizers, f̶i̶g̶h̶t̶ ̶m̶e̶ let's agree to disagree.