New Germany

Hick TOWN

How true are these???

For those who grew up in New Germany, there you, and recognize the
following:

1) what "dasn't" means
2) that "coppers" aren't police but a form of money
3) that "hooters" aren't on a woman, but something you smoke to get high
4) you took your father's work truck to school, complete with diesel,
powersaw, or chains on back
5) the community pool is on the lake
6) Garney
7) that the only Tim Horton's coffee available is Irving coffee
8) the line up at the liquor store at 10am is only equal to the banking line
on cheque day
9) where a traffic jam means a tractor trailer is parked in the road
10) that squirelling means spinning your tires ... bonus points if it's in
the school parking lot
11) leaving school to go to one of three greasy eateries means summer's in
the air
12) you know what a Kirk's jerk is
13) the Station yard
14) you call a volunteer firefighter to find out where the fire is
15) you go to Bridgewater and *they* make fun of your Lunenburg County
accent
16) you know that the video store was actually a drug store
17) you stayed at "The Welfare Hotel"
18) you were conceived at the Canada Day garden party
19) you've gone tubing down the river
20) you buy vegetables or fish out of the back of a truck
21) you let your wife get a hunting license so you can bag two deer
22) your car has been hit by deer a minimum of two times
23) there's a CB in your truck
24) you read the "Court Report" to make sure they didn't spell your name
wrong
25) the only place to drink is the Legion
26) you met your better half at a Legion dance
27) the railroad tracks are in better condition than the main road
28) you remember when Eggie's was owned by Eggie
29) you've ever had to wash manure off your car
30) you've had people think you're from Europe (Germany?)
31) you and your family either work at: Michelin, Bowater (and calls it
Bowaters), in the woods or shearing Christmas trees
32) on the weekend, you rush to read the flyers and are upset that they've
already been "read"
33) you partied more in camps than in bars
34) when someone asks if you own a car, you tell them you have a
four-wheeler
35)you have at least one childhood photo of yourself holding either a
trout or an (empty?) beer bottle, bonus points if it's both
36) you've ever been called "dutchy"
37) ending a sentence with with is perfectly accepted English
38) your family tree overlaps more than once
39) you remember the pizza restaurant
40) you know people who say "farther" instead of "father"
41) someone in your family has had the shine
42) your next door neighbour sold beer
43) your next door neighbour sold hooters
44) you remember when New Germany had a train
45) you make fun of people from the outskirts of New Germany (Hemford, North River)
46) you know that smeltz potatoes aren't made from fish
47) on holidays, you argue about what kind of dressing (black or brown) to
have
48) you've ever filled in a pothole with gravel, sawdust, or other fill
49) you go into a gas station and ask for "unleaded"
50) goin' to town means cruising around the TOB
51) you recognize at least two people in the community notes section of the
Bulletin
52) you've ever read the telephone book to see who has placed an ad in the
classifieds
53) you don't go to get your hair cut -- you go for the gossip
54)your truck follows one of the following designs a) multicoloured b)
welded or fixed with sheet metal and pot rivets c) jacked up d) has a
wooden box instead of a metal one e) is painted with Tremclad
55) instead of being affiliated with a political party, people know you come
from either GM, Ford, or Dodge families
56) you organize your week around Bingo
57) you've spent at least three years trying to get your Grade 12
58) if, instead of going to a dance that turns into a fight, you go to a
fight
that turns into a dance
59) think that plaid or doeskin is appropriate clothing for shopping or
family reunions
60) you spend time at the local garage, just "hanging" out
61) you give directions that involve signposts like "hang a left by the old
Zwicker place"
62)you call a house "the old Zwicker place" or "the green house" even
though it's owned by "people from the city" and is now painted blue
63) you know the meaning behind "Spring Breakup"
64) family stories revolve around mythical muscle cars
65) anyone has ever laughed when you've enunciated your telephone number ...644
66) you get TFC.
67) you know everyone you graduated with, and half are related to you.
68) you have relatives who are related to you twice.
69) when anyone ever asks if you've been on vacation, you tell them you've
been camping.
70) your car has 60/4 air conditioning: four windows rolled down and you got
to drive 60 miles an hour.
71) when you go to a tree lot for your Christmas tree, you literally go to a
tree lot and cut your own.
72) you hate store-bought jam and pickles because you're accustomed to
homemade
73) you've ever used one of the following verbs: boaring, squirreling,
rutsching, gutzing
74) you got into a car for the first time and wondered why it didn't have a
rabbit and a turtle on the gear shift
75) you're jealous of the Springfield kids because they have
more snowdays than you
76) you've ever partied in a hall where there's no running water, just an
outhouse
77) you remember when New Germany could support two grocery stores AND a
general store
78) going to the drive-in was a great night out, except for those damn
mosquitoes
79) you know three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup
80) you've never gambled at a casino, but you HAVE played all the games of
chance at the local garden parties
81) most of your meals are made up of meat, potatoes and sauerkraut, except
for Saturday night, which is beans night
82) you know the difference between chicken and pig manure with just one
whiff
83) you've listened to Swap Shop either to buy something or make fun of the
people selling stuff
84) you go to all weddings and funerals for the sandwiches
85) you refer to people by a nickname like The Cube or Sonic the Hedgehog
86) you get your library books from the Book Mobile
87) you've ever driven a K-car, Crapolier, or the 'Vette
88) you've taken a dip in the river
89) you've outrun the police on a dirtbike or four-wheeler
90) remember when going to Wal-Mart was a great excursion to the city or the valley
91) you and your parents had the same teacher in school
92) most of your clothing has come from the "boutique" or the Daisy
93) your neighbours know more about your personal life than you do
94) it's a tradition to go skating on a pond at night, which is lit up by
burning tires
95) you go around to the piles of trash just before spring or fall clean up
to decorate your living room
96) rising oil prices don't concern you because you heat your house with
wood that you've split and stacked yourself
97) you've ever shot a squirrel, porcupine, or skunk
98) you've ever been to an ox-pull
99) your car stereo and rims are worth more than your car
100) on April 1 you become a fishing widow instead of a sports widow
101) you were a "heathen" because you played cards on Sunday
102) you stole staplers, paper, and dictionaries from school for no
particular reason
103) you either mow a field with your lawn mower, or mow your lawn with a
tractor
104) you've earned a bit of money either picking strawberries, blueberries,
or haying
105) you stole peas or beans from your neighbour's garden, then ate them raw
106) you know all the words to "All the gold in Caledonia"
107) you're an entrepreneur because you operate a yard sale every Saturday
and Sunday throughout the summer
108) all your bedding was made by either your mother or grandmother
109) you rented a church hall or the Legion for your wedding reception
110) have more than one satellite dish on your roof