noobskates

First coined by Kizuel, from new (with b as in freebie). + skates(skâts)) = "noobskates"

~Noun

--breaking down the definitions--

NOOB: a newcomer or novice, esp. an inexperienced user of the Internet or of computers in general.

SKATES: Shoes or light boots with a metal runner or blade fitted to the sole, used for skating on ice.

EXPLANATION: although the definition of a "noob" and a "noobskates" (when referring to a person) are virtually the same, the use of "skates" on the end of "noob" reinforces the absurdity of the individual's "newbieness". It is both singular and plural with the s termination.