north florida

Irrelevant side of florida that no one gives a shit about.

The University of North Florida is one of Florida's several public higher education institutions. Also referred to as UNF it is located in Jacksonville, FL and conveniently located near the beaches and the nearby Town Center. The campus is on a nature preserve so wildlife is everywhere--especially the Canada geese who never migrate and who pretty much everyone hates (students in Osprey Hall on lakeside are particularly vindictive). UNFs current undergraduate student body is around 16,000 as of my last look on their website. They also offer a graduate program and many scholarship opportunities. Best things to do on campus include sitting out on the Green in nice weather and going to the gym or hitting the nature trails. Things to watch out for: the skateboarders are everywhere and some of them do not watch where they are going and geese poop is everywhere as well. All in all UNF is an amazing school and anyone who says differently needs to get some more school spirit. Go Ospreys!

Not to be confused with any bears of the genus ursa. This borderline mythical creature has been known to haunt the isles of Trader Joes and other locations where overpriced groceries are sold to wealthy suburban whites. The North Florida Moody Bear is known for it's grooming behaviors including, but not limited to, its proclivity to spend excessive time in the bathroom to ensure it's hair is immaculate. This is a highly social organism that is known to be extremely social, frequently they can be seen flirting with human females. While they often appear quite tame, domesticated even, don't let your guard down as they will respond violently to anything that causes messes in their natural habitat. They have bizarre sleeping habits that result in often trying to sleep however very rarely actually succumbing to slumber. This species becomes most aggressive when awaken from its slumbers so it is advisable to never slam doors in it's presence. This is an anomalous organism that has left biologist dumbfounded as it is sustained entirely by la croix, and frequently goes months without consuming anything else.

The north Florida double decker is when I one gets a DUI and is responsible for an abortion before the age of 18.