Opiate Paradox
The strange phenomenon, and a cruel joke of the gods, where when taking opiates such as vicodin, oxycodone, or H, one will become extremely horny yet totally unable to ejaculate. This unfortunate circumstance can cause the medical condition priapism, as well as broken blood vessels, penile chafing, depression, and insanity.
Feverishly masturbating for 4 hours after receiving vicodin for a teeth pulling, little Timmy was another victim of the unfortunate opiate paradox.