patricia raglin

Kapaun Mt Carmel in Wichita, Kansas was built around this ancient deity. Ms. Raglin exists out of time, and God turns to her for guidance and counsel. She holds the keys to Heaven and Hell, and Hell consists primarily of cheaters and gum-chewers. One cannot quantify the value of her class or the amount of extra credit given in a year's time. During the enlightening and philosophically enriching time that is AP English IV, a wooden rocking horse can be likened to masturbation. If you are chosen as one of her inner sanctum (Colloquially referred to as National Honor Society), one may reach a new level of enlightened consciousness. The psychologically "enriching" activity, also known as essay writing, increases the intellectual capacity of the human brain tenfold; furthermore, sentence patterns exponentially magnify this transformation of the mind (Sentence Pattern 1a). Finally, we come to perhaps the highest regarded activity of all: Book Chat. Book Chat is the discussion of extremely reputable novels (i.e. young adult novels) with the most astute of scholars at Kapaun Mt Carmel. To summarize, Raglin is perhaps the greatest professor to ever grace our insignificant planet, and her classes expand the power of the brain to the nth power.

In all honesty though, English class with Patricia Raglin consists primarily of total bullshit and lots of Sparknotes reading. The only thing you might learn is how fake it till you make it.

Everyone's favorite English teacher, until she mentions the quiz you're supposed to take that class.