Penguin chick

1. (noun) A young or newly hatched penguin.

2. (noun) A human female of the noblest order who works both with and for the preservation of various penguin species. The penguin chick is highly resistant to low temperatures. She has a steady foot on icy terrain and, like her penguin charges, the penguin chick is a skillful bobsledder. Her body will display scars and bruising, the result of the flailing beaks and claws of hungry or struggling penguins. The penguin chick wears these marks with honour and dignity, badges of her dedication and selflessness in the face of overwhelming odds in the fight for penguin conservation. Competing human females should exercise caution when engaging a penguin chick in a hostile manner for constant and innumerable penguin flipper slaps have made her impervious to conventional human female hand-to-hand combat techniques. Furthermore, bird droppings and raw fish carcasses are also unlikely to be effective against her in battle. Do not proffer penguin chick a plastic straw or coffee cup under any circumstances. It is generally advisable to avoid conversations about plastic and other petrochemical products if at all possible, especially if she has had a long work day. Be not fooled by a penguin chick because she wears socks embroidered with penguin motifs - the penguin chick is at the core a warrior and highly trained. The penguin chick is an example to us all.