Porridgeotamus
A porridgeotamus is a man beast borne of nature that will devour any visible food source in its path, regardless of constitution, flavour, taste or ownership.
Man: Hey, did you see my raw totellini
Other man: Yeah, but it was devoured by that wild Porridgeotamus over there
Other man: Yeah, but it was devoured by that wild Porridgeotamus over there