Pubo-Helmular Discomfort (PHD)

A painful condition whereby one or more pubic hairs becomes lodged inside the foreskin of the penis, against the helmet. Movement will result in the hairs being stretched and pulled, causing untold agony.
This is caused by the penis being confined in a small space (ie underwear). It usually occurs after the sufferer has had an erection and the penis is shrinking back to its regular size.
Can be solved by a cabinet reshuffle