regisphoma

A condition where an individual born with a grotesquely disfigured face that proliferates to extreme levels of ugliness with age. Regisphoma is asympotmatic until puberty at which point the ugliness metastasizes to all internal organs and bodily functions. Telltale symptoms include mild retardation and deterioration of the spine rendering it nonexistent . Only one individual has ever been documented with this condition.

Symptoms: Lack of spine causes the inability to keep pants up at the waistline and the tendency to act like a doormat in relationships. Mild retardation results in failure to lock bedroom door during masturbation, a strong preference for gay thai men as hairdressors, and a mouth that is incapable of keeping a secret.