Reportard
One who cannot handle any percieved insult directed towards their person, true or imagined. This butthurt causes said person to cry like a hungry baby and become full of impotent rage. Once the butthurt is too much to bear, which is usually immediate, they report the vile offender to cause a 30 day reprieve from the onslaught.
Adam couldn't handle the heat in Illumitardi so he regressed and became a reportard.