River Shytz

A large, mythical, and extravagant river of true liquid-shit that forms the boundaries between the supposed magical, evil lands of Shitus, Wypus, and Pypus. In Shreek Mythology, River Shytz is an evil, ferocious and dangerous deity that will haunt anyone who is unfortunate enough to somehow teleport into the dimension it exists in, with incurable bloody hemorrhoids for the rest of their natural-born life. Many say that they have came across the Shytz River at least once in their life, and that it is not a good thing to be poking around in. Once you are teleported into this new world through still unknown means, many people of religious backgrounds say that you will have to cross the River of shit to get back to your own world. How do you do this you may ask? In some accounts, people were provided with canoes. Some, small wooden boats. Others? Well, they just had to swim for it. The River is over 5 miles wide and 1,000 miles long, about the size of the Amazon River. Some who survived to swim across it and tell the tale said that there were “things” swimming under them. The constant smell made it unbearable to travel across and several drowned, or were pulled under by mythical animals.

Randy: I sure hope I don’t travel to River Shytz after going down this mysterious road to get to this stupid frat party.