routney
an erection so substantial that even facial skin is stretched to distortion. Often accompanied by blueballs. The bearer of a routney looks like he's had a really bad facelift. Beware: you can only afford two in a lifetime -- it's claimed that a third routney will kill you.
As bad as Kenny Rogers facelift is, it only makes him look like he has a mild routney.
Routney
An erection so huge and hard it causes all of the blood to rush out of your head and you pass out
Tyrone didn't come to work today because he had a routney. I hope he doesn't die as a result!