Rumpledickskin

1. A semi-mythical creature who, in an accident involving a time machine and an anesthesiologist, fell asleep for 70 years while undergoing a circumcision, resulting in repeated pulling of the dickskin over that entire span before the cut was finally made.

Example: "Authorities investigating the massive theft of 10,000 wrinkle cream bottles from a shipping container are downplaying rumors that it bears the marks of a Rumpledickskin-like creature."