San Francisco Goggles
Likened to the adolescent "Hairy Tea Bag"; wearing "San Fransico goggles" not only includes the sinus rest place of a hairy linebacker's nutsack, but also causes temporary blinding and an olfactory system shutdown when one's eyesocket is rammed into another man's asshole.
After drinking more than 20 (but less than 40)Lagavulins, I woke up in a primered El Camino wearing some sweat infested, brown rimmed San Francisco goggles.