Bearsnake

A combination of two common football exercises. A serpentine, which requires those participating to jog across the football field using the horizontal yard lines as a path. Those doing a serpentine will start at one endzone and snake their way up five yards for each trip across the field until they've reached the other endzone.

A serpentine becomes a bearsnake when combined with bear crawls. Those unlucky enough to endure the pain of a single bearsnake will experience over 1,000 yards of bearcrawling back and forth across the field.

Because of the infamous difficulty of a bearsnake, the name has become a synonym for anyone who is stupid, retarded, socially awkward, or just plain derpy. If someone calls someone else a bearsnake it means they think so lowly of the person that their mere presence inspires the same pain as one would feel from doing bearsnakes.

Snakey (adj.) is used to describe people or things that possess attributes comparable to bearsnakes. It is not correct to say, "They are bearsnakey" or "They are like a bearsnake." One should exercise the use of this word in these situations.

What's the only thing more scary than a bear or a snake? A spider. Bearsnake is a compound noun and generic term for a spider, formed by combining the names of 2 frightening creatures of the wild, the bear and the snake.

Bearsnake is typically used as an exclamation when a large scary spider is spotted in your immediate vicinity. There are some notable exceptions however. You will be ridiculed if you claim bearsnake on a small garden or house spider. However, for a particular leggy granddaddy-longleg spider, you are allowed to claim legbear. The ultimate and fortunately seldomly used version is wolfbear, which is reserved exclusively for the mighty tarantula. It is critical to never falsely claim wolfbear as this can render your friends in a state of panic and possible medical emergency.