Schpeeve Monkey
A man who has so much back hair that he appears to be the missing link between apes and human beings. This is often times most noticed at the beach and in public pools and also in the north eastern part of our nation due to the cold weather. Schpeeve monkeys are also generally overweight and at least middle aged.
"Is that a bear that fell into the pool?"
"No, it's just a schpeeve monkey."
"No, it's just a schpeeve monkey."