shit cranked

excessive consumption of alchohol or drugs leading to a euphoric state of complete and total useless.

n., the tail on a cat, dog, or any other animal whose anus is located just under the spot where the tail connects to the body. The term comes from the story of Jed Angus, who discovered that when he raised and lowered the tail of his pet dog (as if using a crank), poop came out.