sideline shower
When the shitty plumbing of your building causes the shower to only work at two temperatures: "boiling fucking hot" and "dick shriveling cold," causing you to have to stand to the side of the water stream and touch it really quickly just to clean yourself.
Fuck this seedy motel, the water is so god damn piss ass cold, I have to take a sideline shower unless I want my dick to shrivel up like a raisin.