Bellowellogoworgian

THE BELLOWELLOGOWORGIAN WAR! Now, you may think that the Bellowellogoworgian War doesn’t matter. But. They were BRUTAL! And now there are no more Bellowellogoworgians. WE KILLED THEM ALL! This is a story of bravery. Of intelligence. Of betrayal. Of DEATH! Of… (Dreamily leans against the wall.) Romance! And also… (Leans into a random student’s face and spits all over them.) DEAAAATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE BELLOWELLOGOWORGIANS DID TO ELVEN SPIES? THEY CUT OFF THEIR EARS AND FED IT TO THEIR YOUNG! (The student is dripping with spit and sobbing.) CERTAIN DEATH! DEATH! DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTH