Soap-on-a-roper
A man who devotes excessive energy to avoiding being judged homosexual, thus unwittingly demonstrating his own insecurity with regard to his sexual orientation. Derived from the device used by (among others) prisoners who do not wish to bend over in the shower.
A: Lee could be a serious competitive swimmer if he didn't insist on swimming in those massive military shorts.
B: That's typical, he's a total soap-on-a-roper.
B: That's typical, he's a total soap-on-a-roper.