Sphincterial Quiver Test

The most scientific test known to man that can definitively indicate if a person is going to have or not have diarrhea. The intent of this butt-hole sphincter movement test (SQT) is to provide early warning status of potential outbound hot brown rain. Perfecting this scientific testing capability is especially helpful when one believes they are going to dutch oven or cup-of-death a loved one or friend, but instead serve themselves liquified brown soft serve. Perhaps you are on a road trip and ate some bad gas station food, this test can save you hours of clean-up.

In order to achieve a successful test, one must exercise their sphincter muscles to extend and gently retract their butt-hole to indicate wet or dry status. You will have a positive SQT if you feel heat at the opening of your sphincter during the testing process. Retracting your sphincter immediately will give you time to plan and improvise for this impending emergency.