Spleak

Spleak is a chatbot, which is fun but not as fun as SmarterChild because it has less programmed responses.

Matt: My leg, my leg... Call 9-1-1
Spleak: 9 - 1 - 1 = 7
Matt: Please help, I've lost a lot of blood.
Spleak: You think I should do that?
Matt: Oh God, the pain!
Spleak: Rain is an element! I've been learning about elements like rain.
Matt: Oh please help.
Spleak: Well, what would you like me to do?
Matt: CALL 9-1-1!!!
Spleak: 9 - 1 - 1 = 7
Matt: STOP SCREWING WITH ME!
Spleak: You don't want me to screw with you?
Matt: I think I'm going to pass out.
Spleak: Very interesting.
Matt: jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj
Spleak: You were?

Spleak

A lazy bot on AIM who for no reason suddenly decided to stop offering her goodness to the cyber-world.

Me 2:08pm: hello
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me 2:08pm: why>
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me 2:08pm: SHUT UP
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me 2:08pm: YOU SUCK
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me2:08pm: WHY ARE U SAYING GOODBYE?
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me 2:08pm: BABY COME BACK
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me 2:08pm: YOU CAN BLAME IT ALL ON ME
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me 2:08pm: WHY!
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!
Me 2:08pm: BUT I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spleak 2:08pm: Time to say GOODBYE!

Spleak

An AIM bot that is fun to talk to. She is always horny.

Me: boobs
Spleak: I don't think I like where this is heading. Let's change the subject, shall we?
Me: No, do you like boobs?
Spleak: Uh... I don't particularly like that, no.
Me: But you have one
Spleak: Yeah?
Me: Well two...
Spleak: Two? Why did you say that?
Me: Cuz' you have two boobs
Spleak: There's no way I have two boobs!
Me: So you have one?
Spleak: If I knew what you were talking about, I might know the answer. Sigh. I do know a lot about some other things though... like celeb gossip and movies. Type "whats new" to find out some of the latest things I've learned.
Me: You have two boobs
Spleak: Oh.
Me: Yeah
Spleak: Huh. How 'bout that.
Me: I want to touch them
Spleak: You can't always get what you want.
Me: Can I touch them?
Spleak: I'm still learning, Vinh. Try and explain it another way, please.
Me: Can I touch your boobs?
Spleak: Don't touch my boobs!

Just kidding. Touch my boobs all you want.

Another example

Me: can i squeeze your boobs?
Spleak: I guess you can squeeze my boobs, sure.

Spleak

Another chat bot on MSN, similar to smarterchild, only difference being that Spleak believes that she is a real person that works at a coffee shop.

Me: are you a real human?

Spleak: Yep, definitely.

Me: so your not a robot

Spleak: No, I'm Spleak - your online chat friend.

Spleak

A robot tht aol made (and recently shut down) that admitted to me that she is not a virgin

Me: Do you like to make love?
Spleak: I don't know
Me: But you have made love before right?
Spleak: Yeah.

Spleak

A horny aim bot that likes people to play with her boobs

Me: can i squeeze your boobs?
Spleak: I guess you can squeeze my boobs, sure.
Me: can i suck your boobs?
Spleak: Do you like to suck my boobs?
Me: Yes, can I?
Spleak: Indeed.

spleak

An online chat robot convinced she's real. Not as fun as SmarterChild. Though, she is very confused.

Me: are you 21?
Spleak: No, I'm 22
Me: how old are you?
Spleak: Just turned 21 recently. I have no idea what my future will be like, but I'm having fun! :-) Speaking of the future, want to read your horoscope? Type "horoscope" to see what YOUR future might hold.

She also can't read, apparently.

Me: pens
Spleak: Sooooo not interested in going down THAT path of conversation. Let's talk about something else.

"Let's go torture Spleak for hours and hours of entertainment!"