Tap Crapper
Describes a person who is so paranoid that someone might hear them crapping, that they turn on the tap to drown out the sound of dookies hitting the toilet.
Larry: "where's Dave?"
Tom: "Oh, he's still in the bathroom. Got the tap on and everything, he's such a tap crapper."
Larry: "The man has issues.."
Tom: "Oh, he's still in the bathroom. Got the tap on and everything, he's such a tap crapper."
Larry: "The man has issues.."