Big Disc-Douche
A rotund member of the Asian race, who although very rippliscious, tells perfectly fit athletes that they need to lose weight and get a girlfriend. They have a tendency to take advantage of mentally disabled women, by courting them, and bragging about their relationship. Their attitude is known as "fatboyindenialitus". Although these disc like creatures do their best to walk (passing it off as a quick waddle) in front of others, they have been observed rolling to destinations when they are not around their "peers". This is much more efficient for them, but they need to eat lots of food in advance, much like a bicycle tire needing air.
"Channel 9 news is sorry to report that our cameraman has been crushed by a stray Big Disc-Douche on a long roll."