Text Ferret
Usually a semi-closeted gay man, if not a "full blown in your face look at me gay". Who is on their phone texting other Ferrets non-stop to hopefully close as many deals as they possibly can, for that days depravity. Usually Married, or someones Uncle.
OMG, can you believe my Uncle Chuck, he really thinks we don't know he is not doing "Business" on his phone. I saw his snap-chat, he is so totes a Text Ferret.