Big Schloss
A schloss is a dong that comes in the big and small varieties.
A boy named Justin wearing shorts with a 4-inch inseam hiked a trail in the Blue Ridge Mountains. When he reached the precipice, he was huffing and sweaty. He looked out across the rolling green hills and it was so beautiful, he couldn't believe the sight, and neither could his weiner. It got erect, the tip poking out of his short shorts. When he suddenly felt the fresh breeze down there, he thought, "I couldn't have done this without my big schloss".