The Swamp Monster

The act shitting on your hand, then proceeding to rub one out with that hand. This will give the feeling of a hand job from a swamp monster.

A sound made whilst fucking on a tiled or lino bathroom floor. After just exiting the shower/bath so bodies and floor are wet, most likely during cowgirl position as males back will be hard against the floor and as the motion moves up and down air escapes from the skin and water on the floor causing a horrific swamp monster noise.

When taking a dump, a swamp monster is when you have diarrhea with the exception of one large turd. The turd then lurks beneath your brown-green diarrhea as a swamp monster would in a swamp.

Someone so hideous that they should be banished to the sewers along with their parents who should not have brought such a monsterocity into the world and should of at least killed the child when they realised what a horrific freak of nature they were/are. If disease were a physical being, this is what they would look like.

A person who likes sweaty, musty, crotch on a person they are having sex with.

Noun redneck for an ugly person.

An alcoholic beverage consisting of two thirds rum, usually Captain Morgan's, and one third creek water, preferably of the brackish variety.