T.M.O.C.
True Meaning of Christmas - inserting strands of decorative lights into your anal cavity, then inserting a lidless glass jar(as large as possible) mouth-side open towards the anus, turning on the lights, then standing up(as much as possible) and "birthing" the lights back into the jar, and(if successful) using extension cords to show everyone your accomplishment
Gary ate nothing but asparagus all day, so when the jar broke, his green feces mixed with the red blood and made for the best T.M.O.C. ever.