Vapours

The particles of "air" that are omitted from your anal sphincter prior to emptying your bowels...NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH A FART!
Vapours simply seep out of your bottom without pushing.

{noun}

The Canadian spelling of the word. That's right - Canadian. There are only 3 distinct forms of proper English in the world - U.S. English, U.K. English, and Canadian English. Eat your heart out, Australia.

{vapourize, vapourizing, vapourization}

For the actual definition, look up the American spelling (see below).

A substance in the gas phase at a temperature lower than its critical point but with distinct human characteristics, such as a face or free will.

A musician who denies their own past musical ventures whether it be a former band or a feature in a song. Disciples of Vapour tend to change the subject at a moments notice, block any confrontation on the fact they made any music beyond their own personal solo projects.

A lucid synonym for the function and after-effects of testicular perspiration. The term ball vapour should specifically refer to the visual phenomenon of steam rising from a set of sweaty testicles - typically within a climate much cooler than the average ballsack. Ball vapour is less common in countries that experience year-round warmth or extensive home central-heating systems. Northern European countries such as Norway, Sweden and Scotland have been epicentres of the ball-vapour phenomenon for many years.

The primary cause of snoring in men.

When a man lies on his back to sleep, his balls drop over his arsehole, blocking the main south vent and causing vapour lock. The resultant build-up of burps, farts, heavy exhalation fractions, digestive fumes, beer gas, and weed smoke, then has to be vented to atmosphere by alternative means, which requires his gut gremlins to re-route the gases being expelled back through the primary inhalation channel.

Fortunately this is possible because the exhaust gases, being warmer than the incoming air, rise to the upper half of the esophaegus, and the two vapour streams are able to pass each other going opposite directions in the same pipe.

The actual sound of snoring is comprised of millions of tiny gas molecule voices shouting at each other on the way past. The incoming ones are shouting "Oo, poo, you stink," or variations thereof, and the outgoing ones are calling back "fuck you Pinky, you don't know shit and you're gonna get fisted."

Snoring can be avoided completely by the judicious use of a suitable testicle rest which keeps the butthole uncovered and open. Naturally however this means that a man employing such a device tends to fart more in his sleep.

Women don't like us snoring, but they whinge and moan about the alternative as well. This is because they are essentially moaning bitches with penis envy and were born unhappy, but we still love them.

It's a fart thats well dirty it comes from the word chud
It can smell so bad that it may knock you out