Walter Sobchek

Arguably, the second-lead character of the movie The Big Lebowski, Walter Sobchek is:
Owner of Sobchek Security.
Possibly the only one who gives a shit about the rules.
Is calmer than you are.
Holds court over preferred nomenclatures.
Is not a park ranger, however is well-versed in the current California legislation regarding amphibious rodents.
A fan of Aurthur Digby-Sellers, on a personal level.
Does not know his small dog breeds, specifically the difference between a rat-terrier from a Pomeranian.
Loyal friend to The Dude and Donnie.