Wank My Schmeat
When you are in a hurry to get to your grandmother's funeral and you have to quickly bust one out in the Loaf-n-Jug stall whilst one other man is next to you in the urinal enjoying the sweet harmony of your grunts and wheezes.
Oh no! It's my grandma's funeral! I better wank my schmeat to replace the whipped cream on the pie for later!