Wanktitus
Wanktitus or wank fever is is a common illness in which someone spends one or more days recovering in bed with cartoons, cups of tea, spare batteries, tissues and pornographic material at the ready. Symptoms may include a clear or white puss and fatigue. Wanktitus is most common in 16- 25 year olds and is often caused by alcohol and or drug abuse, sleep deprivation, Call of Duty and lack of vagina.
''Dammnnn, I think I caught wanktitus off that fridged girl''