Wet match in a dark room
Someone who is so incredibly stupid that only an obscure analogy could describe their low level IQ. Just as a wet match in a dark room is the antithesis of light, an incredibly stupid person is the antithesis of an intellectual.
" Did you hear about that guy that played Russian roulette with a semi-automatic pistol?"
"Yeah, that dude was a wet match in a dark room. What a fucking moron."
"Yeah, that dude was a wet match in a dark room. What a fucking moron."